When you were young, was everything handed to you or did you work for it?

[cuate01221]

I'm one of those kids that never got a toy unless I worked my ass off to get $20 and buy one. My father has deep wallets(as in $40/hour), but he raised me to appreciate the things I own. I know kids around me who's parents are struggling, but they would rather have a $150 pair of shoes than food in the fridge.

I think of it this way, if you are spoiled by your parents, how the hell are you gonna live in the real world? Mommy and daddy won't always be there to buy you shoes, make you food, or give you gas money.

[saqi44]

my parents have had everything when we were rich, then we got too poor that we were under debt and everything precious had to be sold,i was doing my Bachalors and didnt have had money to pay my fee and for my books, i did my bachalors and worked at nights,i walked like 12 km daily to my work in the night and use to come back 12 km daily just to save 4 Rupees = .1 cents in ur currency (1999), after doing bachalors, i started proper job and bought a bike,i worked from 9am - 6 pm and from 12am- 9 am in the night,my bike got stolen in 2001 caz i was a good rider and won alot of races, i struggled again and bough a small car and i handed it over to my father,caz he has to sell his car for our sake,and besides a smallllll car, i bought a Honda bike and my life kept going, i did everything for my father's business, and got married on my own expenses,then i upgraded my car with another suzuki swift 1992,after keeping it i bought a Nissan Sunny 1989 in 2007 and it is still with my parents,my bro spends on the cosmetics and the rest of the maintenance is still sponserd by me, even if the engine broke or had to put new suspension,whenever my bro tells me that they have got some problem in the car, i send him money to get is fixed,and i am supporting my parents financially as well, i came to Saudi arabia in 2007 and i walked on feet for 5 months,9.5 km from home to office,and back in the evening, ppl use to laugh at me and then i bought a cb7 from someone on installments and he fucked me literally , 5000SR worth of car was sold to me in 9000SR just because of he was giving it to me on installments, i maintained my car slowly and its fine, i love my CB,, i am self made, i never got time to think about others, i only struggle for my self so that i can earn a good living for other,,,,,,i am poor,,weak,,,but my aims are high, and i love what i have and i earned it with what i had,,,,, and i m veryyyyyyyy happy with all that i got

[toycar]

my parents have had everything when we were rich, then we got too poor that we were under debt and everything precious had to be sold,i was doing my Bachalors and didnt have had money to pay my fee and for my books, i did my bachalors and worked at nights,i walked like 12 km daily to my work in the night and use to come back 12 km daily just to save 4 Rupees = .1 cents in ur currency (1999), after doing bachalors, i started proper job and bought a bike,i worked from 9am - 6 pm and from 12am- 9 am in the night,my bike got stolen in 2001 caz i was a good rider and won alot of races, i struggled again and bough a small car and i handed it over to my father,caz he has to sell his car for our sake,and besides a smallllll car, i bought a Honda bike and my life kept going, i did everything for my father's business, and got married on my own expenses,then i upgraded my car with another suzuki swift 1992,after keeping it i bought a Nissan Sunny 1989 in 2007 and it is still with my parents,my bro spends on the cosmetics and the rest of the maintenance is still sponserd by me, even if the engine broke or had to put new suspension,whenever my bro tells me that they have got some problem in the car, i send him money to get is fixed,and i am supporting my parents financially as well, i came to Saudi arabia in 2007 and i walked on feet for 5 months,9.5 km from home to office,and back in the evening, ppl use to laugh at me and then i bought a cb7 from someone on installments and he fucked me literally , 5000SR worth of car was sold to me in 9000SR just because of he was giving it to me on installments, i maintained my car slowly and its fine, i love my CB,, i am self made, i never got time to think about others, i only struggle for my self so that i can earn a good living for other,,,,,,i am poor,,weak,,,but my aims are high, and i love what i have and i earned it with what i had,,,,, and i m veryyyyyyyy happy with all that i got

I hope you dont take offense to this, but your typing shows your not from America, like most people on the forum.


Your story gives us a scope into what real hard times can be, and shows just how unmotivated some of the people in our country are.

You sir, deserve a hand shake and a pat on the back.








My story was shitty. I never had anything like a car given to me. I first had a job at 12years old, and I worked for the boys and girls club. Ill never forget learning about the trash can in the girls bathroom, and what goes in them and why-AT WORK.

I was too young to know shit about periods and girly shit. Maybe I was immature, not really sure. Anyways, at work my boss breaks it down to me about girls, periods, their cycles etc...


Lol

Anyways, back to the topic. My parents stopped buying me clothes the same year. The thought was if I could work, I could take care of myself. I made $4.00/hour. They were druggies, poor and lived like shit and would take half of my paycheck. Dont get me wrong, I ate plenty of top ramen and spaghetti O's, but not much else and life sucked. I didnt pay bills, and I didnt buy all of my food but I did buy toothpaste if I wanted it, deodorant, shoes, clothes etc. Hygene related stuff that my parents didn't so much care about.


I ran away when I was 15, and never moved back. In Oregon, where I grew up, back then getting emancipated was pretty easy as long as you had a place to live and a job. And I did.


So I walked from the Wimer market to Rogue River highschool(google it) everday to go to school. Since I was on an interdistrict transfer, I wasn't allowed to ride the bus. I had to provide my own means. I hitch-hiked when I could too. I hitch-hiked back and forth from Rogue River to Grants Pass(google that) to go back and fourth to work. I only walked it once, and it was soo shitty that I slept in a park the next couple times I couldn't get home.

Eventually I graduated from highschool and was granted an athletics scholarship to Oregon State. I became a beaver.

I earned an associates degree before my scholarships and grants ran out.

I was on track to become an automotive electrical engineer.

Got a shit-job installing car stereos, got into cars(mechanically), sold drugs, got involved in organized crime(Armenians in Portland and stolen cars) and basically my life fell apart. I was in prison twice before I moved to Nebraska in 2001. Though I spent two total years in prison, on different charges on two different situations, I never was found guilty of anything more serious then assault, theft by deception, theft by taking, unlawful use of a motor vehicle and unlawful entry of a motor vehicle. Basically, if you dont say shit they dont know shit. No felonies for me. Went to trial, as the trial ended the prosecutor offered me a plea deal that sent me to prison, but avoided being a felon.

Whatever, as long as I didnt have to snitch I was cool with that. I pleaded no contest.


****FUCK YOU SNAKE RIVER CORRECTIONAL****


Skip forward a few years and now I work in finance, I finished my Bachelors-changed it up and got a BA in accounting, landed a career job, started a contracting company, got married, bought a house, had a family etc.


I grew up, on my own two feet. Ive done all kinds of cool shit, traveled a bunch, done some shit I wouldnt suggest doing, and dont regret any of it.



To the Op's point;

When I was a youth, a 10k car or really just a nice car seemed like a lot. As I grew older and started to have money and assets I quickly realized that small amounts of money, like 10k, wasn't shit.

Whats that do, give you 2-3 months off work? Hahahahaha, it used to seem like so much money though.


So what used to seem so rediculous became more clear, that buying your kids a car was nothing to be jealous of. Its the attitude the kids have that always pissed me off.


Now that I have kids, I can assure you my sons car will be "cool" even if he doesnt work for it. I'll make him learn to wrench-ha, actually he already does quite a bit for as young as he is. He follows directions very well.


Anyways, I guess what Im saying is I felt the same way you did, and now I will be the parent on the other side of the coin.

Consider the idea that parents feel good about giving their kids stuff they couldnt have had as a kid.


I know thats why Ill be quick to make sure my son has brand name clothes and has a car when he turns 16.


Call me crazy, but I understand why parents do it-being a parent and all.

[LadyG]

Saqi44- My foreign friend...

I respect your struggle greatly. I have known many kids here who have supported/helped support their families..but none of them are walking long distances in Pakistan/Saudi Arabia!

Much love!


I have had my face rubbed in my poverty; and it taught me that money does not equal class, manners, or education.

[LadyG]

Toycar-
I agree with you, (being a parent and all) as long as they earn it somehow.

I don't care how wealthy/poor I am when my boys start driving, they will NEVER have more than a two thousand dollar car as their first vehicle. (at least from meh pocket)
I will buy it if they deserve it. (Hard work, good grades, volunteering..whatever)
I would also spend 2k on parts for something they wanted to build...
If they work to save for a vehicle, they could buy whatever they wanted, and I would add that 2k on top.

But I do know that if any of my boys were to deviate from their upbringing; and become ungrateful, stuck up, cruel little twits, I wouldn't give them shit.

[MikeW]

so they dont have to put up with bullshit poor people do?

What's that supposed to mean? I think rich people do more "bullshit" than poor people do...

shows your not from America, like most people on the forum.

"Most" people on the forum...?

Im pretty sure at least 90% of the members here are from "America". Mainly the states and Canada.

[deevergote]

90% qualifies as "most"

[MikeW]

90% qualifies as "most"

Read it again, Mike. He said "NOT from America, like most of the people on the forum." As if to imply that most of the members here, are NOT from America.

I hope you dont take offense to this, but your typing shows your not from America, like most people on the forum.

[gloryaccordy]

Read it again, Mike. He said "NOT from America, like most of the people on the forum." As if to imply that most of the members here, are NOT from America.

I instantly got what dude was saying, stop nitpicking.

Shit like cars and who has what in high school (or ever really) don't matter. Stack your $$$$ so you're not a slave to your possessions and don't worry about what the next man has. Shit doesn't matter. Warren Buffett being rich has little to nothing to do with the fact that we all have bills to pay.

I hope that when I am a parent I will be able to

- teach my kids the value of hard work + time management so they can do well in school and work to buy their own cars
- teach my kids the complete lack of value of everything beyond an education in high school.

In HS your only job is to get the best grades you can and make it out w/no kids or felonies. I'd box Pacquiao to have such little responsibility, suck it up.

[saqi44]

toycar ! ur a hardworker too bro God will definately bless u with success ....Amin and i totally agree with u,that parents would rip there heart out for their kids,,, but for my son, i will teach him how to earn something and how to keep it... i will teach him not to rely on parents,, and oh yes ! i am not an american, a senior friend of mine from cb7tuner told me the day before yesterday that my grammer is not good at all,,hehehehe so please bear my bad english
and LadyG ! my mother always told me that saqi u havent done anything for us and she always kicks me out from my home,,hehehe and i always smile that mom! take it easy,, i will take care of u,,now its been 8 months that i am driving my car with my defected tranny hope that i will be able to save money to change the tranny in coming January, 2012.
and Pali_Mo ! bro its not a bad thing to be a poor person,we have got all the luxuries in our lives which we have wanted,,all the comforts, so we are not poor,,loosing ur self respect and dignity in poverty is VERY BAD,, and besides,,,Cars are materialistic things, Engines and machines does not have any emotions for ur emotions, ur car doesnt care if ur excited or not, they will do what u will command them to do, cars have no brains, so u shudnt think about them,,take care of ur relations,,ur parents,ur brothers, ur family,,that is what matters, dont get jealous on other cars, if some kids at school are having a BMW, and ur having a CB7,,,one day will come when u will have a BMW and i hope that u will have a CB7 too,,so that we all will be intouch forever

[LadyG]

^^Saqi

We can understand you, so your english is better than some native speakers on this forum.

Unfortunately, Americans (especially those with little/no education) have little understanding about the kinds of poverty that exist in other countries. Our poor can afford to buy a 200 USD car, or ride public transport where it exists. That just doesn't happen outside the westernized countries.

They have no idea that in places with currencies and economies different than ours, that the poor elsewhere make the equivalent of pennies for a days work. Americans often define themselves and their relationships to those around them, by the things they posses. We work more hours, for less happiness than anybody else. Dignity is a possession, almost.

My children are small, and I have tried to explain to them that in some other places there are not stores on every corner, and starving really happens. (Explaining Somalia to a 6year old, ftl ) However, they have nothing in their experience to relate it to.

[toycar]

bro its not a bad thing to be a poor person,we have got all the luxuries in our lives which we have wanted,,all the comforts, so we are not poor,,loosing ur self respect and dignity in poverty is VERY BAD,, and besides,,,Cars are materialistic things, Engines and machines does not have any emotions for ur emotions, ur car doesnt care if ur excited or not, they will do what u will command them to do, cars have no brains, so u shudnt think about them,,take care of ur relations,,ur parents,ur brothers, ur family,,that is what matters, dont get jealous on other cars, if some kids at school are having a BMW, and ur having a CB7,,,one day will come when u will have a BMW and i hope that u will have a CB7 too,,so that we all will be intouch forever

I love reading stuff like this. Much love to this guy!!

When I have traveled in the past, I always enjoy listening to other cultural ways of describing life, experiences and philosophy. What matters, and what doesnt.



This whole topic reminds me of a quote;


"Those that matter, dont mind. Those that mind, dont matter."

[h22sparkle]

Well I always had stuff but I earned it. While people spent money on useless things like clothes and shit and stuff that they didn't need I kept my head in the books on how to make money. I learned that friends will try to bring you down too or even family. The best thing to do is to ignore them and keep them at bay and aquire revenue.

Times later on where shit was hard as haters who see me coming up gettin money would try to do shit to try and hold me back, but it only helped me improve. Now I own my own business and just ignored the negativity and proceeded to make my own money.

I met more people who are business oriented while the same people with their negative actions are still in position that they are in and that are still piss broke no hope for the future.

Many people cant really believe how do I aquire shit so fast its because I use my head and do my math and I watch my money spendings and watch my costs keeping it to a minimum. Theres alot of shit that comes with the territory alot of jealousy and envy its all just negative energy like my girl say lol. If I wasnt me id hate me too shiiiiiieeeet lol.

[GHOST 2.2]

i worked my ass off for everything.

my parents are well off, upper-middle class income. but my dad is soo cheap that he makes it seem like we're poor.

they gave me a 10 year old cb7 at the time, and for everything that went wrong or i upgraded was 100% off my own wallet. they didn't help me buy my 2door coupe, and my dad loaned me 2500 so i can get the lude. but i had to pay him back.

my relatives ask me all the time... "your parents are loaded. why don't they buy you a car?" i tell them "because they're cheap."

my relatives ask my dad, "why don't you buy your son a car?" he goes "my dad never bought me a car, why should i buy him one?"

[JohnD1079]

What's that supposed to mean? I think rich people do more "bullshit" than poor people do...

Im talking about dealing with a broken window motor you cant afford to fix when you're poor. Im talking about going to the grocery store every other day to buy whatever food you can afford instead of just buying it all in 1 purchase. Im talking about not being able to worry if you can afford braces for your kids fucked up teeth. Im talking about all the grey hairs you get when you worry if youll be able to make the next payment. Im talking about making payments instead of paying in full and paying way more than you expected to pay for it.

Dont give me the what is that supposed to mean, cuz you know exactly what it means.