i really need some motivation. i'm so crushed right now it's not even explainable. i can't even eat. i don't know what to do.
so some of you know the girl i've been talking with and such. she was my only happiness. being in florida i'm so homesick and i miss my friends, parents, and don't have my honda here. that's okay though because i need to keep my head in the books, but thinking about jennifer made everything bad just fade away.
i met her online through a racing forum and we talked for a few weeks and when i went to indianapolis to trade some stuff.. we met up on december 8th (my mom's birthday). things were cool.. she seemed so awesome so i had to make more trips back.
i went back on december 16th and we hung out all day, went to the movies, layed in her bed.. it went so perfectly and i knew she was really into me. well, she was acting weird after that night because she knew i was leaving for college again and didn't want to get attached.. but we still had to hang out.
i went back on january 4th with my friend from here (92accordTS), i just showed up and suprised her. she was so happy to see me and all my worries and all that went down the drain when she hugged me. we didn't have much time because alan had to go home and get his daughter.. but i told her i promised i would come back the next night, which was my last night in ohio. she kissed me when i left and it sent me to heaven.
well, i went back the next night. we had an ice storm earlier in the day and it knocked down the phone lines and her cell was all messed up. i drove around her city for about an hour and a half trying to get in touch with her.. and i finally did. my eyes were watering because i didnt want to leave at all.. but we went to the store then back to her house so it was cool.
i was planning on leaving around 11pm so i could get home at a decent hour for the long drive the next day.. well we laid in her bed for hours.. just cuddling, kissing, and talking. there was no way i could leave her so i stayed there for a while. i didn't leave until 5:30am, when i was leaving at 7:30am for florida. i asked her if she would give me the chance to be her boyfriend and show her i'd treat her so good.. she said yeah.
i got to florida.. she text's me all the time saying she misses me and calls me in the middle of the night and that stuff. well i get a text from her this morning at 3:30am saying this..
"adam, i want ot tell you something but you have to promise not to get mad and still be my good friend, because i love ya homie."
"well, i met this guy in november. he left for the military. we talk every day, i pretty much fell for him when we met. i'm in love with him, and i tried to fight it."
"i liked you adam. i want to be great friends. i care for you, i can't deny what i feel for him. don't hate me, i don't wanna lose you! your a great guy."
my only happiness is gone. i left at 3:45am and just went to stay at this ladys house i know. shes always there for me.. but i'm so hurt inside and i have never met a girl like jennifer. she is just like me, races, knows her stuff about cars, it's just too good to let go.. and i don't know what to do.
i've been crying for hours now.. i'm lost.
so some of you know the girl i've been talking with and such. she was my only happiness. being in florida i'm so homesick and i miss my friends, parents, and don't have my honda here. that's okay though because i need to keep my head in the books, but thinking about jennifer made everything bad just fade away.
i met her online through a racing forum and we talked for a few weeks and when i went to indianapolis to trade some stuff.. we met up on december 8th (my mom's birthday). things were cool.. she seemed so awesome so i had to make more trips back.
i went back on december 16th and we hung out all day, went to the movies, layed in her bed.. it went so perfectly and i knew she was really into me. well, she was acting weird after that night because she knew i was leaving for college again and didn't want to get attached.. but we still had to hang out.
i went back on january 4th with my friend from here (92accordTS), i just showed up and suprised her. she was so happy to see me and all my worries and all that went down the drain when she hugged me. we didn't have much time because alan had to go home and get his daughter.. but i told her i promised i would come back the next night, which was my last night in ohio. she kissed me when i left and it sent me to heaven.
well, i went back the next night. we had an ice storm earlier in the day and it knocked down the phone lines and her cell was all messed up. i drove around her city for about an hour and a half trying to get in touch with her.. and i finally did. my eyes were watering because i didnt want to leave at all.. but we went to the store then back to her house so it was cool.
i was planning on leaving around 11pm so i could get home at a decent hour for the long drive the next day.. well we laid in her bed for hours.. just cuddling, kissing, and talking. there was no way i could leave her so i stayed there for a while. i didn't leave until 5:30am, when i was leaving at 7:30am for florida. i asked her if she would give me the chance to be her boyfriend and show her i'd treat her so good.. she said yeah.
i got to florida.. she text's me all the time saying she misses me and calls me in the middle of the night and that stuff. well i get a text from her this morning at 3:30am saying this..
"adam, i want ot tell you something but you have to promise not to get mad and still be my good friend, because i love ya homie."
"well, i met this guy in november. he left for the military. we talk every day, i pretty much fell for him when we met. i'm in love with him, and i tried to fight it."
"i liked you adam. i want to be great friends. i care for you, i can't deny what i feel for him. don't hate me, i don't wanna lose you! your a great guy."
my only happiness is gone. i left at 3:45am and just went to stay at this ladys house i know. shes always there for me.. but i'm so hurt inside and i have never met a girl like jennifer. she is just like me, races, knows her stuff about cars, it's just too good to let go.. and i don't know what to do.
i've been crying for hours now.. i'm lost.
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