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    hahaha craigslist ad..

    taken from local car forum, this ad is for a place about 10 minutes from where i live hahaha



    Date: 2008-12-19, 6:05PM PST


    I am a born again Christian. Why is this a problem for people????! I have a house that's MINE and I PAID FOR IT. I also have a basement apartment for rent. It's a great space for I'm charing very little for it, $480 monthly, for the right tenant. I know it's ILLEGAL to require a Christian in the apartment, against the human rights. That's why I NEVER put this in my ad. Why then does it keep getting taken down?

    HERE IS THE AD I POSTED, AND THE AD THAT KEEPS GETTING REMOVED:

    Available Immediately – Broadway and Commercial – Showing Saturday and Sunday – Email for directions and additional information.

    What kind of apartment is it?

    • One bedroom basement apartment with separate entrance
    • Tastefully decorated with modern décor
    • Approximately 650 square feet
    • There is even a window! Security bars installed for your safety and to prevent unauthorized activity
    • Closed circuit camera installed for security and safety. One in your suite, one at the entrance, and one in the exercise yard

    Rent:
    • $480.00 per month
    • First month’s rent + ½ month security deposit due at move in
    • Small pet allowed with approval and payment of additional ½ month pet damage deposit
    • One year lease permitted, option to renew lease at end of the term with no increase in rent
    • LANDLORD’S SPECIAL! Move in before January 1st and don’t pay for the remainder of December! That’s significant savings.

    Included in the rent:

    • Electricity
    • Heat – Maintained at 21 degrees with lock box to prevent unauthorized tampering. Additional heating available for $20.00 per extra degree of heating per month. You may not use your oven to heat the apartment. If you do, you will be fined $50.00 per occurrence.
    • Air conditioning – Maintained at 25 degrees during the summer with lock box to prevent extra cooling from being dispensed. Additional cooling for sale for $20.00 per degree of cooling requested per month.
    • 25" Zenith color television set with basic cable service - INCLUDED IN RENT!
    • Wireless internet (with content filter applied to block forbidden/immoral websites) - INCLUDED IN RENT!
    • Provision of coin laundry services - You will have your own personal coin laundry washer and dryer machines. Washers and dryers are paid using a token system. Tokens can be purchased through the landlord. Washer tokens cost $4.15 each and dryer tokens cost $3.60 each. You are not allowed to use foreign
    currency or slugs in the washer and dryer. Violators will be fined $100.00 per infraction.

    About us: (Landlords)

    We are conservative, bible believing, God-fearing, born again, evangelical Christians. We interpret the bible literally in every way possible. We live a strict moral code and observe God’s laws in our everyday life. My wife stays at home and teaches our home-schooled children. I work as a pastor at a local congregation and am active in the faith community.

    About you: (Tenant)

    • You are employed
    • You do not participate in lascivious deviant sexual behavior
    • You do not choose alternative lifestyles as your lifestyle
    • You do not have any criminal history
    • You must have excellent character references
    • You do not smoke, drink or take drugs. Mandatory drug screening required.


    Additional Rules/Conditions:

    CLEANLINESS: You are responsible for the cleanliness and orderliness of
    your apartment. Beds are to be made before leaving your suite,
    countertops must be wiped down, and you must remove all trash. Upon
    inspection, if the tenant's basement suite is not clean, the cost of
    cleaning services plus a fine of $100.00 will be levied.
    LIGHTS: The lights in your basement suite and in the day room are not to
    be tampered with. If a light needs repair, report the condition to the
    Landlord.
    WAKE-UP: Wake up will be at 5:30am each morning. All ceiling lights in
    the suite will be turned on automatically.
    LIGHTS OUT: Ceiling lights in the suite will be turned off at 11:30pm.
    CONTRABAND: The following items are considered contraband – alcohol, illegal drugs, tobacco, weapons, lock picking equipment. If any contraband is discovered to be in your possession, you will be subject to a minimum $1,000.00 fine. In addition, your items will be confiscated permanently. Second offense – you will be evicted without notice. A bailiff will escort you and your belongings off the premises. Your security deposit will not be returned.
    SMOKING: The basement suite is non-smoking. Anyone in possession of
    tobacco products of any kind or any lighter or matches, will have their
    contraband items confiscated and will be fined $100.00.
    INSPECTIONS: The Landlord will conduct unannounced inspections to ensure
    that these rules and regulations are being followed.
    VISITATION: Visitation periods will be on Saturdays and Sundays from
    1:00 p.m. until 3:00 p.m. All visitors and their vehicles are subject
    to search while on landlord property. Refusal to allow a search can
    result in their being barred from all future visitation privileges. All
    visitors must sign the Visitor's Log. Unauthorized visitors will be
    escorted from the property, and the tenant will be fined $250.00.
    I.D. BRACELETS: Each tenant will be issued an I.D. bracelet with his/her
    photograph. It must be worn at all times. If you lose your I.D.
    bracelet or it is broken, you will be required to purchase a new one at
    the nominal cost of $5.00.
    EXERCISE YARD: The tenant will have access to the exercise yard in the
    area to the back of the property for 2 hours per day from 4:00 pm to
    6:00 pm. The tenant is not allowed to bring any personal property to
    the exercise yard. Once the tenant leaves the exercise yard on a
    particular day, he or she may not return. No boisterous behavior is
    allowed in the exercise yard. There is no smoking allowed in the
    exercise yard. Minimum fine for exercise yard infractions is $50.00.




    * Location: Broadway and Commercial
    * it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

    PostingID: 964514051




    http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/rnr/964514051.html
    ..[CB7][STAR]..
    MY MEMBERS RIDE THREAD

    #2
    imma rent that for a month and burn in afterwards

    Comment


      #3
      Good God man. I don't even think an Amish person could handle those regulations. Visiting hours, ID bracelets and automatic on/off lights?

      If I wanted to go to prison I would just commit fraud or something

      Comment


        #4
        kinda wants me to rent it and then have a loud drinking party. buddies pull up in loud revving trucks and cars. and oo yeah we will be smokin
        1991 White Accord LX 5-speed aka Lil' Red

        Comment


          #5
          Sign me up!

          1999 BMW M3
          2001 Honda CR-V SE RT4WD
          2005 Chevrolet Tahoe Z71
          2015 Suzuki V-Strom 650

          Comment


            #6
            gotta be a joke, I could believe it until the prison shit at the end

            on the stairs, she grabs my arm, says whats up,
            where you been, is something wrong?
            i try to just smile, and say everything’s fine.

            Comment


              #7
              Impossible. I love the visitation part.

              Claire - '92 Mercedes-Benz 500E - AMG&Bilstein Treatment - The Wolf in Sheep's clothing.

              Alice - '97 BMW 540i6 - Dinan Tuned. - Low Profile Weekend Warrior.

              Felicia - '11 Ford Fusion - Luxury Package - Daily.. daily.. ugh.


              Originally posted by JoshM
              Okay to do: "I'm sorry I broke your mailbox, here's $100.
              NOT okay to do: "I'm sorry I fucked your sister, here's $100.

              Comment


                #8
                "camera installed in your suite" lol, he likes to watch.

                My swap thread
                Main relay proplems?--DIY

                Comment


                  #9
                  Other than the "650 Sq Ft" and the fact that it has a kitchen, it sounds like a 10X12' prison cell. I can't see anyone WANTING to love there. But I guess it takes all kinds...
                  Originally posted by Junior Smurff
                  Nevermind guys, google search works wonders!

                  I don't have road rage, my car just goes faster than yours!

                  Accords are for winners. And Grandmothers. But mostly winners.


                  I have grown so Tired of Internet Illiteracy. Please learn proper spelling and grammar. For your sake and that of your children.

                  Comment

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